Meditation - what is it?

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 In the shadows of our society lies a silent struggle that often goes unnoticed—the problem of male grief. At Men’s World Today, we’re dedicated to bringing this issue to light, revealing the unspoken pain that many men endure.

The Silent Struggle of Male Grief

Grief is not a choice, yet men often find themselves trapped in a paradox where society expects them to be the pillars of strength, the unbreakable rocks upon which others lean. When the tides of loss and sorrow come crashing in, these same men are left without a lifeline, struggling to stay afloat in a sea of unacknowledged emotions.

This issue is deeply rooted in societal expectations of masculinity. For generations, men have been conditioned to disconnect from their emotions, viewing them as weaknesses rather than facets of their humanity. This disconnection is not just a personal choice but a societal norm that has left many men emotionally stranded.

The Impact of Ignored Grief

Statistics speak volumes about the silent epidemic of male mental health. The CDC reports that 1 in 10 men experiences anxiety or depression, yet less than half seek help. In 2020, the rate of male suicide was nearly four times that of women, and men were three times more likely to die from alcohol or substance abuse. These numbers are not just figures; they represent real lives, real pain, and a real need for change.

James Hollis, Ph.D., captures the essence of this loneliness, suggesting that if you strip away a man’s network of intimate friends and his sense of instinctual guidance, leaving him defined solely by his productivity, you glimpse the inner state of the average man. This notion is horrifying, yet it is the reality for many.

The lack of acceptable ways to process pain and loss leaves men with few options. The result is not an absence of grief but a silent battle with emotions that demand attention. Without outlets, men may resort to isolation, dissociation, or numbing behaviours like substance abuse. Unresolved grief can also manifest as anger, a more socially tolerated emotion for men, but one that does not facilitate true healing.

Changing the Narrative

It’s a misconception that men simply have their own way of dealing with painful experiences. If that were true, the troubling trends we see wouldn’t exist. The common ways men respond to grief do not necessarily mean they are processing their emotions healthily. Western cultural expectations often discourage men from grieving at all.

From a young age, men are bombarded with messages to “suck it up,” “walk it off,” and “boys don’t cry.” They are taught to hold their chins up and grit their teeth through the pain. To show raw emotion is to show a lack of control. This societal instruction has created a barrier to healing, leaving many men to navigate their grief in silence and solitude.

As we delve into this complex issue, it’s crucial to recognize that change begins with conversation. By bringing male grief into the light, we can start to dismantle the barriers preventing men from experiencing the full spectrum of their emotions and finding the support they desperately need.

Steps Towards Healing

Addressing and acknowledging the suffering of loss is an act of bravery for many men who have never been shown a path for processing these feelings. Yet, there is hope. A growing movement among men is emerging, one that embraces grief and seeks deeper meaning in their inner lives. This shift is challenging long-held stigmas and encouraging men to experience the full spectrum of their emotions.

Here are steps men can take to better navigate their emotional landscape:

1. Stretch      Your Capacity to Feel: Embrace your emotions, treating your      inner “feeling function” like a muscle that needs exercise. Steady      breathing practices can aid in becoming more present with your inner      experiences, allowing you to embrace your whole self.
2. Acknowledge      Your Emotions: Recognize and accept your feelings.      Grief is a natural response to loss, not a weakness.
3. Seek      Support: Reach out to friends, family, or      professionals. Sharing your emotions is a step towards healing.
4. Join a      Support Group: Find comfort and understanding among      those who have faced similar losses.
5. Express      Yourself Creatively: Use art, writing, music, or physical      activity as outlets for your grief.
6. Practice      Self-Care: Prioritize your physical and mental      health through rest, nutrition, and exercise.
7. Learn      About Grief: Educate yourself on the grieving      process and what to expect.

In the UK, organizations like Cruse Bereavement Support and The Samaritans offer specialized services for men. In the USA, the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention provide resources and support.

Conclusion

The journey toward healing is not one to be walked alone. By fostering environments that encourage emotional expression and support, we can help men cope with grief and grow through their experiences. The narrative around male grief is changing, and it’s time for society to listen, support, and embrace this transformation.

At Men’s World Today, we are committed to providing the resources and support men need to navigate their grief. Together, we can create a world where men feel empowered to face their grief with courage and emerge with renewed strength.

As the days grow shorter and temperatures drop, the winter months can be particularly challenging for many of us. With less daylight and the persistent cold, it's easy to feel isolated and down. This is , often associated with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), can be especially tough for men who have suffered trauma, such as grief, job loss, business hardship, exam failure, or health issues. During this time, checking up on each other is not just a kind gesture—it’s a lifeline.

Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) 

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that's related to changes in seasons. SAD typically begins in the late fall and continues through the winter months. Reduced sunlight can disrupt your body's internal clock and lead to feelings of depression. It’s crucial to recognize the symptoms, which include fatigue, depression, hopelessness, and social withdrawal.

The Importance of Checking In

For men, societal expectations often push us to bear our burdens quietly, but this approach can lead to severe consequences. Checking up on each other during the winter months can mitigate feelings of isolation and provide much-needed support. Men who have faced significant trauma—be it grief from losing a loved one, the stress of losing a job or business, the disappointment of academic failure, or health issues—are particularly vulnerable.

1.Combatting Isolation

Regular check-ins can help combat feelings of loneliness. Knowing that someone cares and is willing to listen can significantly boost a person's mood and sense of belonging.

2.Providing Emotional Support

Men often feel the pressure to be strong and self-reliant. By checking in, we can create a safe space for emotional expression, making it easier for others to share their struggles without fear of judgment.

3. Identifying Warning Signs

Regular contact helps us recognize any warning signs of depression or other mental health issues early on. This way, we can encourage friends to seek professional help if needed.

Strategies for Maintaining Mental Health and Well-being

Here are some strategies inspired by Jacqueline Harvey's book, *Body Cycles*, to help maintain health and well-being during the winter months:

1.Establish a Routine.

Having a regular schedule can provide a sense of stability and purpose. Whether it's setting a consistent time for exercise, meals, or relaxation, routines help combat the disorienting effects of long, dark days.

2. Light Therapy

Exposure to natural daylight can help alleviate symptoms of SAD. On sunny days, try to spend some time outdoors. For darker days, consider using a light therapy lamp, which mimics natural sunlight and can boost your mood and energy levels.

3. Stay Active

Exercise is a powerful tool against depression. Regular physical activity releases endorphins, which help reduce stress and improve mood. Find an activity you enjoy, whether it's walking, jogging, or hitting the gym.

4. Healthy Eating

Diet plays a crucial role in mental health. Eating balanced meals rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains can provide the necessary nutrients to keep your body and mind in good shape.

5. Stay Connected

Make an effort to stay in touch with friends and family. Social interactions are vital for mental well-being. Schedule regular calls, meet-ups, or virtual hangouts to maintain those connections.

6. Mindfulness and Meditation

Practicing mindfulness and meditation can help manage stress and anxiety. Techniques such as deep breathing, yoga, and mindfulness meditation can promote relaxation and emotional balance.

For Those Offering Support

For those of us reaching out to friends in need, here are some practical tips:

1. Be a Good Listener

Sometimes, just being there to listen can make a big difference. Let your friend talk about their feelings without interruption or judgment.

2. Offer Practical Help

Whether it's helping with chores, providing a meal, or just spending time together, practical support can lighten your friend's load and show that you care.

3.Encourage Professional Help

If your friend seems to be struggling significantly, encourage them to seek professional help. Offer to help them find resources or accompany them to appointments if they're comfortable with it.

4.Regular Check-Ins

Consistency is key. Make regular check-ins a part of your routine. It shows that your care and concern are genuine and ongoing.

5.Educate Yourself.

Learn about SAD and other mental health issues. Understanding what your friend is going through can help you provide better support.

In conclusion, the winter months can be challenging, but by checking up on each other, we can navigate these difficult times together. Inspired by Jacqueline Harvey's *Body Cycles*, let’s commit to staying connected, supporting one another, and maintaining our mental and physical well-being. Your check-in could be the difference between someone feeling alone and someone feeling supported. Let’s make this winter a season of connection and care.